The Enneagram Type FOUR personality has a large capacity for emotional sensitivity and depth. These individuals want singular lives that take advantage of their one-of-a-kind gifts and sensibilities; they have no interest in being ordinary. They want to connect deeply with people who understand them and their feelings, yet often feel that the world doesn’t get them. They want others to notice them and draw them out.

FOURS often resonate with a feeling of abandonment and focus on what’s missing. They long for whatever they deem ideal. They assume that others have what they lack or have simply settled for second best. This belief gives rise to the emotion of envy. It grows out of a feeling that there is something good that is just beyond their reach. FOURS can be unreasonably yet intentionally drawn to the unattainable. This drive can engender competitiveness in the pursuit and melancholy when faced with reality.

In a dramatic view that life is suffering, the only thing that gives it meaning is beauty. FOURS check in constantly with their inner artist and take note of what is different, beautiful, and special. Their aesthetic touch helps them craft an inner world that inoculates them from an outer world that can be unpleasant or mundane. They bring people, moods, stories, and experiences inside themselves, often rendering them more appealing (“romantic”) than they really are. They can escape to this interior life whenever they want.

FOURS are stalwart family members, friends, and colleagues who will not shy away from crises or buckle under intense emotional pressure. They understand suffering and are not afraid to share in it. They want others to know that they are seen, heard, and remembered. FOURS want to make others feel that it is good and beautiful that they are here. Their capacity to explore and narrate the human experience gives them a distinctive edge in artistic expression.

FOURS have a Type FIVE wing of investment (thinking and percolating before engaging) and a Type THREE wing of success and industriousness with an eye toward encouraging others to have a meaningful experience. When the FIVE wing dominates, FOURS observe and stay out of the experience; they want to be left alone. When the THREE wing dominates, they want to share their experience with the world and broadcast what they’ve found. FOURS are naturals for the creative life.

FOURS are also influenced by their dominant instinct:

• Self-Preservation FOURS are the most practical and materialistic of the type, working hard to get what they perceive others have that they lack. They’ll surround themselves with beautiful objects whether or not they can reasonably afford them. They tend not to share their pain, preferring to suffer in stoic silence.
• One-to-One FOURS hold to the romantic ideal of the knight in shining armor who will rescue them from the dreary suffering of this world. Failing that, they project their suffering outward, expressing their needs and making demands of others. A competitive drive propels them to be the best and secure their place among the chosen few.
• Social FOURS experience their distinctiveness as both a gift and a burden. They revel in the intensity of their feelings and may look upon others as crude and insensitive. Yet they covet a place among the beautiful and elite and may doubt their ability to gain acceptance. This duality may lead to an affinity for unique groups and/or alternative lifestyles.

All FOURS tend to have an uneasy relationship with authority. They don’t think that rules and regulations apply to them. In fact, they may take pride in breaking rules, especially if they can get away with it. That notwithstanding, they still crave the respect and attention of folks who traffic among the “best people,” however defined.

Under stress, FOURS may adopt characteristics of an Unhealthy TWO. When feeling isolated, disconnected, or misunderstood, they may respond with forced friendliness that borders on clinginess. While this behavior stems from a desire to put the relationship on solid ground, it may drive people away.

The antidote to stress lies in remembering that feelings are not facts. They are informed by the sum total of past experiences, sensitivities, and unrealized fantasies that may color current perceptions. FOURS need to take a dispassionate view of the current landscape and seek out friends who will speak the truth lovingly. They help themselves by moving forward with favorable interpretations of the facts wherever possible. FOURS also find that when they stop striving to be unique, they find their own voices.

FOURS find strength in movement toward a Healthy ONE. From this position, they commit to principles and actions beyond the constraints of subjective emotions. They become more grounded and self-disciplined. They accept the prevailing circumstances without lamentation and work toward meaningful goals to effect change. They stay present to themselves and others.

The Enneagram Type THREE personality wants to succeed, avoid failure, and be the best or first. These individuals are goal-oriented workaholics whose charm, ambition, energy, and competitive nature serve their need for personal advancement. They feel like the whole world is watching them, and they want all due approval and recognition. They aren’t particularly concerned with being liked. Feelings make them uncomfortable and impede forward movement.

THREES view life as though they’re climbing a mountain or working a machine. They are doers and go-getters who don’t like to sit around. They’ve got “to do” lists by the bed, on the kitchen table, in the car, and at work. They’re constantly multitasking and gladly take short cuts to make forward progress. THREES harbor the false sense that their worlds will crash and burn if they stop moving. There’s security in knowing that everything can be pushed aside in order to deliver the goods. They don’t like to sit around. Free time can make them feel lost.

THREES are chameleonlike and adopt personas that they believe will lead to a good result. They assume roles with the potential for reward and praise and get rid of everything else. People pay attention to them due to their confidence, lack of doubt, and inspirational personality. THREES focus on the art of persuasion and presentation to achieve results; it’s all about performance. They’ll tell you what you want to hear and believe it when they say it. They’ll massage their image until it works, and may lose themselves in the process. They can get so caught up in their own press releases that they disconnect from reality.

THREES won’t do something if they can’t win or will feel shame. Failure exposes inadequacy and will be avoided at all costs. (They may even avoid you if they think you’ll be a failure!) Rather than endure humiliation, they’ll cut-and-run and have a story about it. That attitude cuts them off from experiencing things that could bring joy but for which they may not be stellar and/or have an awkward beginner stage.

The THREE’s wings draw their attention to those who are suffering and forgotten (FOUR) and compel them to take up the mantle to help them thrive (TWO). These influences transform compassion into a call for action. They’ll push information and encouragement onto others in the confident belief that the objects of their discourse will be better for it. They’re also driven to put their personal stamp on everything (FOUR) while creating devoted followers (TWO) under their leadership (THREE).

THREES are also influenced by their dominant instinct:

• Self-Preservation THREES work hard to attain a level of success that provides for their material security and stability. While they appreciate recognition for their achievements, they put more faith in the quality of their work and the efficiency with which they prosecute it. They value integrity and work hard to be who they say they are.
• One-to-One THREES place greater emphasis on their personal appeal than their worldly success. They want to be desired and admired by important others; they take great pride in having an alluring mate to show off. To that end, One-to-One THREES are as invested in their physical packaging as they are in their personal and intellectual competencies.
• Social THREES are status seekers who bask in the limelight and pine for influence and applause. For them, pedigrees and credentials matter as do neighborhoods, cars, social circles, and designer labels. They are great image makers and networkers. They use their political will to do good and work hard to raise everybody up.

While all of that external focus can pay dividends in terms of personal advancement, it can have a deleterious impact on THREES. Their chameleon nature can cause them to lose sight of who they really are or what they really want. They can become slaves to the images that they’re trying to maintain. They can also be so caught up in work that they fail to make time for restorative activities and authentically intimate relationships.

Under stress, THREES may adopt characteristics of an Unhealthy NINE. They shut down and numb out in response to the relentless pursuit of success. While maintaining an outward appearance of busyness, their attention may be drawn to unimportant tasks. They may also get caught up in a fantasy world surrounding their next big success and put pressing concerns on hold until that day dawns.

The antidote to stress lies in developing the capacity to recognize when they’re living into a false image of themselves rather than speaking and acting authentically. The path to enlightenment requires that they drop the need for public acclaim. That level of clarity can be attained by taking time to relax and allow for thoughtful reflection on what is really going on. It’s also supported by cultivating trusted relationships that welcome forthright communication.

THREES find strength in movement toward a Healthy SIX. From this position, THREES discover the voice of their inner guidance and gain the courage to embody their true nature. They commit to projects and relationships that hold personal significance irrespective of public opinion. They are loyal and evoke loyalty in others.

The Enneagram Type TWO personality focuses on relationships, helping others, and gaining approval. These individuals strive to improve the human condition through connection. They want to help others find the paths to their highest selves, get what they need along the way, and bring people into their lives for mutual benefit. And, of course, TWOS want to play a role in the unfolding of all that goodness. They are often employed as brokers in loving kindness (e.g., ministry), human potential (e.g., counselling, coaching), or business (e.g., human resources, real estate).

TWOS present themselves as upbeat, energetic, and friendly with an infectious positivity. They carry an underlying belief that they must be helpful and loving to be liked. That orientation makes them stellar colleagues, friends, and family members who go to great lengths to express their affection and provide support. They are great listeners who revel in others’ joys and tap deep wells of empathy in times of sorrow or strife. Woundedness provides fertile ground for nurturing and attentive care. While brimming with compassion, they have limited tolerance for negativity unless they have a role in making it positive.

TWOS process lots of data when meeting new people to determine who they are, how they move, and what they need. They consider themselves unusually skilled at reading people and may use flattery to gain trust and approval. Armed with keen insights, TWOS adapt their behaviors to suit the moods, preferences, and needs of others. (“I’ll be who you need me to be.”) While they clearly find fulfillment in attending to others’ needs, their generosity generally carries an expectation of reciprocal care. TWOS want their acts of service to build ties that bind and may get resentful when they aren’t forthcoming.

At root, TWOS have difficulty believing that they can be loved and accepted for simply being themselves. They form an identity around having a role, being of service, and helping others. They fear disapproval or being disconnected. TWOS relax when others create an opening for relationship and share feelings and concerns that they can internalize. This outward orientation may reflect a fear that others will assess their inner landscape and find it unworthy of attention or love. (“You are nobody until somebody loves you.”)

The ONE wing empowers TWOS to set standards for their work in realizing human potential and reforming the environment. Their drive to relieve suffering finds companionship with a seriousness of purpose toward effective action. The THREE wing provides concern for social standing (i.e., who or what is worthy of attention) and recognition for their work. It also motivates them to be exemplars of interpersonal connection and helpfulness.

TWOS are also influenced by their dominant instinct:

• Self-Preservation TWOS hold a strong expectation that others will attend to their needs. They may work tirelessly to gain that reciprocity, or they may present themselves as child-like and needy to induce others to take care of them. They may also traffic in guilt trips to get what they want. (“After all I’ve done for you…”)
• One-to-One TWOS find comfort in being a best friend, an intimate partner, or the power behind the throne. They crave private time with their significant others and seek exclusivity in the sharing of confidences. To attract this individual, a One-to-One TWO invests time and energy in becoming irresistible. (“I’ll puff you up and then be right beside you.”)
• Social TWOS want to be at the center of the social arena and enroll others in their agenda. A desire to be noticed and remembered prompts them to show up as competent, knowledgeable individuals worthy of admiration. They gravitate toward those who are popular or powerful. They also scan the room to make sure that everyone is OK. (“Has everyone spoken? Do they have what they need?”)

All that helpfulness has a dark side. TWOS can get so caught up in serving others that they forget to take care of themselves. They may become so addicted to a relationship that they foster dependency. They may also become so adept at mirroring their compatriots’ emotional energy that they lose sight of their own emotional core.

Under stress, TWOS may adopt characteristics of an Unhealthy EIGHT. They can be aggressive when fearing loss of an important relationship or when they don’t get what they need out of existing ones. They may become possessive and controlling, a response that likely adds fuel to the fire.

The antidote to stress lies in catching oneself in the act of flattering or serving others solely as a means of currying favor. It means recognizing the underlying fear of worthlessness that often drives this behavior. It calls for cultivating self-love and shedding the overwhelming concern for what others think.

TWOS find strength in movement toward a Healthy FOUR. From this position, they learn to acknowledge their own feelings, needs, and expectations and find more direct means of satisfying them. They give themselves permission to prioritize self-care and cultivate relationships that are genuinely nurturing.

The Enneagram Type ONE personality has a highly attuned sense of right and wrong based on a carefully crafted set of internal standards. These individuals deem it virtuous to do the right thing; they take action based on what they think they should do. This impulse may lead them to see the highest good and motivate diligent efforts to attain it. It may also give them an eye for seeing error, driving them to reform what has gone awry.

ONES take their time forming opinions, making decisions, and taking action. Everything goes through an inner law court during which they act as plaintiff, defendant, judge, and jury. Judgments will be defended rigorously at the conclusion of this exacting process. ONES have a hard time making mistakes and an even harder time accepting blame. When at fault, they ruminate, self-criticize, and then institute self-improvement so it won’t happen again.

ONES like well-defined boundaries. They’ll establish one or more territories over which they exercise mastery, generally something at which they are skilled, experienced, and/or natively interested. Once they define their territory, they like to make progress toward worthy goals using efficient, methodical systems and time tables. They’re realistic about what they can accomplish and practical in their approach to getting it done.

ONES prefer individual effort and have faith that they can do things better than others. When in charge of groups, they feel the weight of responsibility for everyone’s work products. To assuage their anxiety, they’ll define roles, responsibilities, and outcomes to ensure that everyone is clear on expectations. They have no problem letting others know when things could be done differently and better. They don’t think their critiques deal harshly with others; that’s how they talk to themselves. Moreover, they don’t want to have to clean up other people’s messes. They’re not terribly concerned with being liked; they want to garner respect and do good work.

Healthy ONES strive to be honest in all of their dealings. They say what they’ll do and do what they say. They have great powers of discernment. They have keen analytical minds and a strong work ethic that supports planning, execution, and problem-solving. They adhere to standards of fairness and set aside their own needs for the benefit of the collective. ONES tend to influence others by example and by the consistent exercise of sound judgment.

ONES want to be useful. From their NINE wing, they are broad systemic thinkers who have a passionate desire to improve the world around them. From their TWO wing, they empathize with the people they serve and work tirelessly in their behalf. A sense of being responsible for everything (NINE) and needing to be good (TWO) reinforces their natural instinct to be correct, be right, be competent, and be in integrity.

ONES are also influenced by their dominant instinct:

• Self-Preservation ONES tend to be workaholics driven by a commitment to excellence in themselves, their work, and their immediate environment. They may have a difficult time letting their guards down for fear that things will go wrong and/or threaten their material well-being.
• One-to-One ONES seek perfection in their intimate relationships. They’ve got high expectations and aren’t shy about expressing their opinions in service of improving others and getting what they want. Fidelity and commitment rank high in their esteem.
• Social ONES seek to be moral exemplars who leverage their time and talents for the greater good. As gifted educators, advocates, and orators, they’re unabashed about speaking their minds in public forums. They’re frequently drawn into politics, community organizing, and journalism.

Unhealthy ONES can be experienced as arrogant, inflexible, critical, and controlling. They may beat themselves down by a relentlessly judgmental inner voice that tears at their self-esteem and denies them simple pleasures. This voice may also find fault with others and give little weight to their ideas or opinions. While the vice of ONE is anger, they experience resistance to it and judge themselves for feeling it. As such, they may not recognize the tempests brewing in their own teapots.

Under stress, ONES may adopt characteristics of an Unhealthy FOUR. They seek relief from their inner critic and hefty burdens through flights of daydreaming and romanticizing. They’re prone to moodiness as they come to terms with a sinking feeling that no one understands or appreciates them. Their heretofore reliable discipline and self-control may abandon them.

The antidote to stress lies in developing the capacity to listen to the nurturing inner voice who sees goodness and is lenient toward faults and failings. It grants ONES the freedom to set healthy limits and accept help from others. It gives ONES the space to be open to their needs and vulnerabilities without judgment. It also engenders awareness of repressed anger as a bellwether of underlying issues that need to be addressed.

ONES find strength in movement toward a Healthy SEVEN. From this position, they learn to be affected by their environment without tensing in resistance to it. They realize that there are many ways to do things, and that pleasure can be sought rather than avoided. As they free themselves from the grasps of their inner critics, they imbue their lives with more joy, enthusiasm, curiosity, and open-mindedness.

If you’ve ever participated in a team-building corporate retreat, you’ve likely had exposure to one or more personality typing systems. These tests and associated exercises encourage self-awareness along with an appreciation for differences among colleagues. I found them interesting, although I was never entirely sure that we used our insights to the greatest effect once the retreats were over.

Over the past few years, I’ve had renewed interest in this line of inquiry. In my little corner of the Pacific Northwest, we’re blessed to have one of the country’s premier teachers of the enneagram, Dale Rhodes. He is the founder and chief guru at Enneagram Portland. He curates wonderful content while attracting an animated and engaged community for embodied learning. After all, what better way to learn about different personality types than to see them in action, hear their stories, and profit from their self-reflection?

Before I get to why I study the enneagram, it’s probably useful to give a brief primer on what it is. The word itself comes from the Greek ennéa meaning nine and gram meaning something written or drawn. It refers to the nine distinctive personality types articulated by Bolivian mystic Oscar Ichazo (via meditation on ancient texts) and developed by Chilean born psychiatrist Claudio Naranjo. Interviews with countless individuals of each type have contributed to a detailed understanding of traits and behaviors. The nine types are represented as points on a continuous circle with connections to two other points (deemed “stress” and “security” points) as well as their neighboring points (deemed “wings”).

There are lots of books, websites, blog posts, podcasts, et al on the subject, along with variations on how each pundit embraces the teachings of the enneagram. For the sake of brevity, here are descriptors that I use to capture the nine types:

1. The Perfectionist (a.k.a. Reformer or Idealist)
2. The Connector (a.k.a. Helper or Giver)
3. The Performer (a.k.a. Achiever or Motivator)
4. The Individualist (a.k.a. Romantic or Sensitive Soul)
5. The Observer (a.k.a. Thinker or Investigator)
6. The Security Seeker (a.k.a. Planner or Loyal Skeptic)
7. The Enthusiast (a.k.a. Epicure or Generalist)
8. The Protector (a.k.a. Challenger or Commander)
9. The Peacemaker (a.k.a. Mediator or Team Player)

Each of these types has three subtypes or “instincts”:

• A Self-Preservation instinct seeks well-being by focusing on issues related to survival, material security, safety, and marshaling resources.
• A One-to-One (or Sexual) instinct seeks well-being by forging quality relationships with specific individuals; they are attracted to intense experience.
• A Social instinct seeks well-being through membership and relationship in social groups.

These elements combine to produce 27 distinct personas that differ in what garners attention, what attracts energy, what manifests as strengths and weaknesses, what causes satisfaction and stress, how they communicate, etc. The model has been further developed to characterize high-functioning versus low-functioning individuals within each type. I’ll provide a little deeper dive into these types in the coming weeks.

Why do I study the enneagram?

Self-Awareness. The enneagram creates space to take stock of my behavior patterns and think deeply about why I do what I do. While my patterns don’t align chapter-and-verse with my dominant archetype (a Social 9), there’s enough commonality to shine new light on what makes me tick, what draws my attention, what pushes my buttons, and what sends me to my happy place. I see echoes of all of the other types in my persona and have really benefited from learning about them.

Personal Transformation. In concert with self-awareness, the enneagram suggests pathways to move out of the personality “ruts” that are holding me back and move into a fuller expression of my authentic self. Armed with insights about my thoughts, emotions, and actions, I can make better choices and forge more useful habits.

Improved Interpersonal Relationships. Doing a deep dive on each of the 9 types and 27 subtypes lets me see the world through other people’s eyes. I appreciate the logic behind their approaches to life. I have a better appreciation for what lights them up and what drives them nuts. It elevates my compassion for others and (hopefully) encourages me to behave in ways that maximize positive engagement.

Friendship! The collective of folks I’ve met through Enneagram Portland are really cool people. I’ve had delightful one-on-one get-togethers with classmates from the Enneagram in Literature/Film course and fabulous group discussions in our monthly sessions. In fact, I loved the class so much that I’m back for a second round with all new readings!

Recommended Reading:

• Beatrice Chestnut, PhD – The Complete Enneagram: 27 Paths to Greater Self-Knowledge, ©2013
• Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson – The Wisdom of the Enneagram: The Complete Guide to Psychological and Spiritual Growth for the Nine Personality Types, ©1999
• Helen Palmer – The Enneagram: Understanding Yourself and the Others in Your Life, ©1991